Mashed Poetics

On October 16th I was really ecstatic to head over to The Seven Dining Lounge and participate as a poet in the 32nd Mashed Poetics Event!

For those of you that don’t know Mashed Poetics is a sweet show where a band plays a song then a poet does a poem based on that song as a prompt. Our album was Fashion Nugget by CAKE and you can listen to the album here.

Naturally, having my level of luck and general human goodness attracted to me I received the song  Race Car Ya Yas which you can listen to here. If you carefully listen you can after much contemplation see that this song is just over one minute long and alludes to fuzzy dices and male genitalia. Conveniently, these are two topics that are repeated and symbolic in art forms all across the world.


Overall, the event was extremely fun and I as always was blown away by the wonder that some lower mainland poets can come up with, especially the anti Stephen Harper poem by RC Weslowski where he compared Steven Harper to a Chicken Nugget (after being prompted with the song nugget). My favourite quote was “Pound the Loins.”

The band that was playing was a descendant from the heavens themselves as they were called “The Race Car Ya Yas” just as the song I was paired up with, in addition they are just miraculously musical. Without further ramble here is my poem that I came up with:

This is a poem for anyone who feels like they are in the back seat of their own life.

This is a poem for anyone who feels like they watch their life from the rear view mirror.

This is a poem for anyone who has never felt clearer between what you should be and what you are

This is a poem for anyone born feeling inadequate, misunderstood, like they could be a dried up leaf on a highway or  a rusted wheel on a car going nowhere

This is a poem for anyone who has ever felt that that somewhere inside of them keeps fictional different sides alive, but the internal dice only lands on snake eyes

This is a poem for anyone who has ever sat on a dark chair in a dimly lit room and thought to themselves if I consume anymore of my pretension or pity I will simply transform into a big fuzzy dice

Then this.


Is a poem for you.

I am your big fuzzy dice fairy and I am telling you:

Zoom, zam, zip. Don’t switch lanes

Wherever you’re going! That’s completely OKAY…


Come with me

Take my hand

I know you are on your way..

Let’s enter the land, the land of

The land of race car ya-yas.

Take a step into this race car, scream YA YA!

Do not question your motives. There is no time to waste, or blame, because all that you have is a single one way ticket down heaven’s highway,

Do not change lanes

Do not change lanes

You can’t change lanes

This is a poem for you, for anyone who has ever believed in a big fuzzy dice fairy

This is a poem for anyone who has a simple philosophy like: You gotta get to give

Zoom, zoom, zip

Take my hand and stay with me in the land of Race Car Ya Yas

Please imagine the land of race car ya-yas

A place that moves quickly and sharply

Where there is only an empty single road like a treadmill with two large fuzzy dice hanging on its  horizon


These dice hang dramatically, like God’s testicles.

They hang like God’s testicles from the rear-view mirror that is your life.

They hang like a poem for anyone who is searching for an answer that they want to dig into art for but their only art form comes from themselves

They hang like an all-knowing fate located on the lowest bodily shelf

And one day they will drop down onto the road, and they will roll towards you

God’s testicles are always rolling for you

God’s voice will change and say, “This is a poem for anyone’s who’s ever had The Almighty’s dice balls rolling your fate.”

This is a poem for anyone who rolls and rolls again, but it’s still not going your way

So you just give up and silence the world with a sensual castration daze by singing:


2 thoughts on “Mashed Poetics

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